However, fearing the Lord is not simply just loving God. It is acknowledging that He holds our eternal fates in His hands. Hebrews 10:30-31 should be the basis for all decisions we make.
The Lord shall judge his people. It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. Hebrews 10:30-31
Fearing the Lord means respecting His rules and realizing His love for us is why He put those rules in place to keep us safe, not because He is a cruel bully. We are not to fear Him as an abusive family member, but because He is the only one who will make the decision on whether or not we will go to Heaven or Hell. He wishes that none would ever go to Hell ([God] is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance. 2 Peter 3:9) which is why He requires us to do as He (not man) commands.
When we think of all our choices as being observed by a Holy God, we should be in awe and fear. It should make us think twice before we pick up a piece of literature or watch a program full of witchcraft, violence, sexual perversions, and outright mock God and all the Bible stands for.
One of my favorite late preachers, Leonard Ravenhill used to put it this way (I am paraphrasing.), "When we stand before God on judgement day we won't simply say, 'Hey, buddy, thanks for the cross,' we will bow on our faces in fear and trembling." No matter how defiantly you choose to live your life, or arrogantly claim you don't need God, if you truly picture what Heaven will be like the moment you arrive (I am not speaking of all eternity full of bliss and joy, but just the initial encounter with God) you will realize it will be very frightening as you relive all the sins you refused to repent of and all the rules you intentionally broke. Because God is unfathomably gracious and merciful, He will not remember those sins you asked His forgiveness for (notice how David uses the same theme of fearing the Lord):
For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is his mercy toward them that fear him. As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us. Like as a father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth them that fear him. Psalm 103:11-13
At some point you have probably heard or read from the book of Proverbs that "the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge." Proverbs makes it clear that those who refuse to fear God and hate "wisdom and instruction" are "fools" (Proverbs 1:7). It goes on to say in Proverbs 8:13 "The fear of the Lord is to hate evil: pride, and arrogancy, and the evil way, and the froward [not willing to yield or comply with what is required of God] mouth, do I hate. " That one verse alone sums up all I am trying to say.
Proverbs also goes on to describe the fear of the Lord as finding "the knowledge of God" (2:5), "the knowledge of... holy understanding" (9:10), "a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death" (14:27). "tendeth to life: and he that hath it shall abide satisfied; he shall not be visited with evil"(19:23). It also reminds us that we should not "envy sinners: but be thou in the fear of the Lord all the day long" (23:17).
God is very loving, gracious, merciful, and forgiving. "We love him, because he first loved us. (1 John 4:19). Yes, we can have a close walk and friendship with God, but we must never treat God as a casual as a human friend, but respect Him as our Creator and Judge.
Just a few extra verses to think about:
And I saw the dead, small and great, stand before God; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is the book of life: and the dead were judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works. And the sea gave up the dead which were in it; and death and hell delivered up the dead which were in them: and they were judged every man according to their works. Revelation 20:12-13
I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom. II Timothy 4:4
As obedient children, not fashioning yourselves according to the former lusts in your ignorance: But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation; Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy. And if ye call on the Father, who without respect of persons judgeth according to every man's work, pass the time of your sojourning here in fear: I Peter 1:14-17
He that overcometh shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son. But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death. Revelation 21:7-8
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