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Monday, May 22, 2017

Let Others see Christ Through Your Marriage


 
You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden.
Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all
who are in the house.
Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.  Matthew 5:14-16

If you ever attended church, I am certain you have sung, “This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.” When you think of this song, you probably automatically begin picturing all the hand motions, including covering and uncovering your “candle” (finger) to show you will not hide your light under a bushel.  Matthew 5 tells us we are not to keep our lights hidden.  We are boldly to display our relationship with Christ as a lighthouse, a beacon so those lost at sea can find their ways to the Savior.

One of the best ways we can be a good example of God’s love is through our marriages.  I know I have said it before, but I do not mind repeating myself: People frequently tell Mel and I are how adorable we are in our interactions with one another.  In June, we will have been married for five years, but our love never wanes.  People still ask if we are newlyweds and still tell us how much they enjoy seeing how loving and respectful we are with one another.  We have had strangers tell us so many times that they admire how we interact, that I cannot even count the number of compliments.  We keep our public affection decent, but we draw attention because of how we are so giving with one another.  We hold hands and hug (and yes, sometimes we tactfully  kiss), we use loving terms with each other, we do not argue, and the selfless side to our relationship always comes across as we put the other’s needs first.  People take notice.

(By the way, we are the genuine article, we treat each other just as lovingly and respectfully in private; we are not putting on a facade.)

The light shining forth from our marriage has often been a great opportunity to share the love of the Lord.  I was rarely approached for random dialogues when I was single, but when I am with Mel, strangers often start conversations with us, sometimes for 30 minutes or longer.  Although I am very shy and introverted and typically wary of people I do not know, when I am with Mel I feel less self-conscious and can open up and be friendly to strangers.  Being married to a bold extrovert is good for me.  I can more easily share the love of Christ with a husband by my side that helps me feel more comfortable in my own skin.  We have offered to pray for several people because of personal issues they have shared with us.  Our willingness to listen and show compassion makes people feel safe around us and let their guards down.  I fully believe it is only after they see how joyful and respectful our marriage is that they feel comfortable enough to approach us.  They want to know more about why we radiate so much love.  

This seems like such a basic message and not as “meaty” as some of my other blogs.  However, I felt it was important to remind you that someone is always watching; especially if you call yourself a Christian.  The way you and your spouse treat each other in public says a lot more than you realize.  You can either enhance or blow your testimony based on your public interactions.

I do not want to get into the countless poor examples of marriages I have seen from people who attach the title of Christian to themselves.  My point is not to berate other people or to be judgmental, but to make a point.  When others openly do not take their marriages seriously, they make a very loud statement they do not believe in practicing the basic principles of the bible.  They are a poor testimony of their faith.  Consider the following scripture verses, and see if you follow these teachings when in public.  The first one has to do with remembering you are married and to be loyal to your spouse even with your eyes.  The second is a reminder to all those who like to wear short shorts, tight leggings, low cut tops, etc.  Remember you are someone’s wife!  

 But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.  Matthew 5:28

…women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation…
which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works.
II Timothy 2:9-10

Ephesians 5 says we are to treat each other with love and respect.  Each time someone insults their spouse in public or makes it clear they feel their mate is nothing more than a nag, they stomp all over the bible and bury it in the ground.  And trust me, everyone notices when you belittle each other or fight in public.        

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her…  So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it… “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh…” Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.  Ephesians 5:22-33

Always remember other people are watching.  If those people are already critical of Christians, they are watching extra hard, waiting for any excuse to insult believers’ actions.  They are anxious to say, “If that’s what being a Christian looks like, I don’t want any part of it.”  I want my light for Christ to shine even when I am alone, but especially when I am with my husband.  I want others to look at my marriage as a shining example of what pure, honest, respectful, and Godly love looks like.  I want them to see Jesus in us and intrigue them to want to know more.  Mel and I are both honored when we are approached and strangers open up to us and God presents an opportunity for sharing His love.
I want to end this with something we have not yet done, but plan to do in the future.  I read in an old issue of Guideposts where a reader said that he and his wife always tell their waiter/waitress that they are about to pray over their meal and ask if the server has any prayer requests.  He said they receive mixed results, but no one has asked them not to pray, and sometimes the server will even join in the prayer.  What a beautiful way to shine for the Lord!  May we always be thinking of more ways to be bold for Christ and let our marriage be our testimony!   

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